XLV: Signing off from New York

In March of 2005 I promised that I would keep everyone apprised of our whereabouts and adventures during my 2+ year rotation here in New York. Today, we sign off and head West for new adventures in a new city. We do so with bitter-sweetness in our hearts. There will be so many positives about being back in our native Midwest, and in another exciting city. But it is hard to leave here. I struggle to find the words to properly characterize just how hard; we've been overwhelmed by how attached we've grown to the people and places of this area.


My mom once said, of Rome, that it can be stressful and draining at times, but there is something about it that gets in your blood. New York will forever be one of those places for me. That is as shocking to you to read as it was for me to realize, believe me. I came here possessed with the notion of survival, namely, could I? I leave having to stop myself from calling it home.


The difficulties of living here are numerous and daunting. It is arduous at times just to get from place to place, because of the dense population and extreme demand for already crowded real estate. The cost of living does nothing to help. As William Cole once said "New York is a great city to live in if you can afford to get out of it." And of course there are the people, stereotypically thought of as brash. In fact, the people are hard to get to know, with roots deeply engrained in their neighborhoods and towns. But with time-earned trust, you find that they are some of the most loyal and genuine you will ever meet. Those behavioral barriers they create are defensive, because an overly competitive cycle is part of their daily life. But on the other side of the barrier are people who care for their friends and will do anything for them. We've been humbled by their friendship and their outpouring of kindness and support. We are leaving some incredible people behind and we will miss them dearly.


We will miss the places as well. New York is a vibrant, intoxicating city, albeit overexposed to the rest of the country because of the mass media situated here. Over-hype aside, its tremendous energy creates a place all citizens of this country should visit if the opportunity allows. To listen to the long-time residents, the City gleams in comparison to twenty years ago, when its crime and conditions were a punch-line. The relative safety and cleanliness today cannot be overstated, and history looms at every corner. I've tried, over the past 44 emails, to give you a sense of what some of the sights here are like. My feeble words fail; I encourage you to see them for yourself. I will miss that great city deeply, but I'm comforted by the hopeful prospects of visiting soon.


So with that, we head out. The cars and moving van are packed, so wish us safety and sanity, and we hope to see you all soon.

XLIV: Skateapolooza and More Farewell Tour Events

Here we go again with yet another update as the flurry of farewell tour events winds down. My mother responded to the last update by saying that she knew one was arriving in her inbox because Jimmy and I had attended a sporting event. Which begs the question, do I only send updates after sporting events, or do we only go to sporting events to occupy our time? The answer scares me. So, here is an update resplendent with more farewell tid-bits, but devoid of any references to sporting events or my attendance thereof. On Thursday, the Florham Park Roller Skating Rink hosted the 2007 Skateapolooza, alternatively titled "Jimmy's Absurdly Early 9th Birthday Party and Good-Bye to Friends Colloquy." The event was attended by 47 of the 53 members of the Assumption 2006-2007 2nd grade class. With my aunt Jane's help, each participant received a specially designed, pre-addressed, stamped postcard to send to Jimmy at a later date. Needless to say the proceedings were wildly successful.

Just a few days later, on Father's Day, Jimmy was gracious enough to accompany his father on a trip to Liberty State Park, NJ, where the two of us set off to visit Ellis and Liberty Islands. This was Jimmy's third trip to the Statue of Liberty and my first. It makes little sense that one of my last sites to see while living here was the one that so many immigrants to this country saw first. But why start making sense now? The tour to the Islands began on a ferry from Liberty State Park, in Jersey City. In an effort to maintain the authenticity of the experience of the millions of immigrants arriving at the Federal Immigration Station from 1893 to 1954, Jimmy and I were the only English-speakers on board. The ferry ride is impressive, offering incredible views of the Manhattan skyline. The first stop was Ellis Island, where the National Park Service provides an audio tour of the facility, administered through a personal headset. Having participated twice previously, Jimmy opted out of the headset tour and instead talked to me about things that the "annoying lady on the headset" was about to say. After listening to the lady (and Jimmy talking over the lady) for the first 20 minutes, I realized his version of the tour was more interesting and just as accurate. I picked up a job application for him on the way out. Most interesting to me about Ellis Island was the examination area, where immigrants were herded in to receive medical exams, each averaging approximately 6 seconds, and mostly to attempt to diagnose trachoma, a highly contagious eye condition that is potentially blinding. There was also a series of mental dexterity exams administered, in attempts to determine whether a person was crazy. Judging by the population of this country today (e.g., our new friend Buff), these examinations were woefully unsuccessful.

After that tour, we boarded another ferry and headed to the much smaller Liberty Island, just south in the harbor from Ellis Island. Here we were treated to breathtaking views of the 22-story landmark that welcomed so many of our ancestors to this country. While I tried to take pictures, there are none that justly capture what a strange and wonderful sight the statue is. The mammoth skyscrapers that dot the New York skyline today skew the perspective of the giant sculpture until you make it to the island, and there you realize the enormity of a 150-foot tall woman with a torch. Say what you will about the French, they know how to build tall stuff out of copper and iron.

On Tuesday evening, Regis and I had dinner with some friends at Vento, an Italian restaurant situated at 14th street, Hudson Street, and 9th Avenue, in the West Village section of Manhattan. It was a nice meal, preceded by drinks at the Spice Market (because the rooftop bar at the Hotel Gansevoort was closed). This section of the West Village is also known the "Meatpacking District," and runs from West 15th Street south to Gansevoort Street, and from the Hudson River east to Hudson Street. It earned this nickname because it was formerly the center of the City's slaughter and meatpacking industry. And because it is easier to say than "Gansevoort District." I like to say "Gansevoort." I think it would make a wonderful name for a baby boy. I think Jill and Patrick should have considered naming Andrew, "Gansevoort." As part of the City's overall transformation in the early 1990s, the area now has several high-end clothing stores and restaurants. For those of you that read swanky publications, you'll no doubt recall that in 2004, "New York" magazine called the Meatpacking District "New York’s most fashionable neighborhood." That same magazine will be doing a feature on my visit to the area titled "Fish Out of Water."

Hope you are all doing well.

XLIII: Yankees Game

As they say in Jersey, "a coupla three things" from the last update before I get into the latest events of our whirlwind final days here. In recounting our visit to Weehawken (& Vicinity), I failed to mention that Hoboken, NJ is also the birthplace of Pia Zadora, who, as everyone knows, played Girmar in the 1964 classic "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians." May her fans forgive me.

Also, about four months ago, as Regis was driving near our house, she spotted a TV crew filming for the Sopranos at a gas station. She took some pictures with her phone, that, if you can believe this, looked remarkably like a photo taken by someone photographing a gas station out of the window of a moving car. Anyway, as the final season was underway, we diligently watched each week to try and spot our gas station, and every week it appeared as if those scenes must have been left on the cutting room floor. But our patience was rewarded; for anyone on the list that watched the final episode of the Sopranos this past Sunday, you'll be happy to know that Regis's gas station was the place where Phil Leotardo met his darkly comical end.

On June 10th, the boy and I headed to a Yankees game. It was his first trip to Yankees Stadium, and it was on the occasion of "Bat Day." It should be noted that during "Bat Day" at Yankees Stadium, the first 15,000 fans under the age of 14 receive a free 30" Louisville Slugger. Yes, you read that right. Every year on Bat Day, Steinbrenner's attorneys have a coronary while they wait for the game to end, hoping that 15,000 bat-wielding, sugar-hyped youngsters don't realize the leverage of their armed position and stage a coup. Wooden weaponry aside, the game was exciting. With two outs in the 4th inning, the Yankees trailed the Pittsburgh Pirates, 6-5, but had Derek Jeter on 3rd and Bobby Abreu on 1st. The Pirates elected to change pitchers at that point, and the crowd rose to its feet in anticipation of Alex Rodriguez's pending trip to the plate. I leaned over and said to Jimmy, "He's going to hit a home run here." Now, in my lifetime, I've made such ridiculous predictions approximately 13,412 times (Dad can weigh in with the official number). This time, I was right. "A-Rod" proceeded to drill a line drive over the left field fence and the crowd erupted. He hit another HR in the 6th inning, to which the boy said, "we're coming back tomorrow."

The most notable parts of the Yankee trip occurred before and after the game, on the boy's first and second subway rides. Prior to the first subway ride, we took a quick trip to Trinity Church, located at the intersection of Wall Street and Broadway. Trinity Church was built during the Revolutionary War, and Alexander Hamilton and other notable people of the period are interred in its adjoining graveyard. The church is also situated over the largest buried treasure in movie history. After that, we walked about a block down Wall Street, to Federal Hall, which is across the street from the New York Stock Exchange. It was here on April 30, 1789, that George Washington was first inaugurated to the presidency. I bet you thought I was going to make a joke there. I couldn't think of one. From there, we boarded the "4 train" and headed toward Yankee Stadium.

The 4 train runs under the east side of Manhattan and into the Bronx. Upon arriving in the Bronx, the Subway train runs on elevated tracks, and one of the stops is adjacent to Yankee Stadium. On the ride up to the Stadium, we met a Pirates fan named "Buff". At least that is what his Pirates jersey, worn over a Pirates Hawaiian shirt, said on the back. We also met Buff's son, "Moron" (again, based on the back of the jersey). Buff took a liking to Jimmy, gave him a Pirates pin, and asked for a photo once we arrived at the stadium. During almost all of his conversation with Buff, Jimmy wore an exasperated look on his face, the kind which indicated a realization that his own IQ exceeded Buff's exponentially. On the way back from the game, we had a different experience. The boy unwittingly morphed into his alter ego, "Ladies Man," and charmed four Manhattan co-eds who were so smitten with him that they almost missed their stop.

Lest you think that Jimmy is having all the fun, Maggie and Annie recently attended an early birthday party for Maggie, with 7 other friends. At the party, the girls got their hair done and dressed up like princesses, and got to walk down a "red carpet." At the end of the carpet they were photographed and interviewed with questions like "what's your favorite flavor of ice cream?" I think I paid for this party in lieu of a wedding. I'm waiting for the ruling.

The fun of those days subsided as we entered the last week of school. Today was the kids' last school day, and things were obviously emotional. Regis let it show at one point, to which Annie said "Mommy are you sad, do you need to talk to my dad?" While that quote has high comedic potential, anyone who has seen how Annie looks or acts knows that she means me.
That's plenty for now. Let us know how you are doing.

XLII: Scranton, Cooperstown, Aaron Burr and Tony Soprano

"Doctors don’t understand pain. When a doctor says, 'you're about to feel some pressure' ... buckle up" - Brian Regan

To beg, borrow, and steal Brian's material, when I say that this update is going to be a little long, you better buckle up.There are just a few weeks remaining in the Watsons tenure in the Northeast and there is much to see, do, and destroy. As I mentioned when we last met, we've been trying to develop a list of "must-see" places to visit before we head westward. The initial conference went something like this:

Me: "Alright kids, where do we want to go, we only have a little bit of time left here."
Jimmy: "How about [proceeds to name 113 national landmarks that are in either Washington DC or Boston]"
Maggie: "How about Disney World?"
Annie: "Little Mermaid and Holly Hobby Christmas"
Regis: "Somewhere by myself."
Me: "It's settled then, we're going to the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown."

Since I am older than the kids [editor's note: he did not say more mature, just older] and Regis likes baseball, that was the big winner this past weekend. But since it is a 4-hour drive to Cooperstown, there were some local scenes to see first. Also, we noted that we haven't really seen much in New Jersey. Most of our sight-seeing has been in New York, Pennsylvania, and other colonies. Maybe there is a reason for that.....

So on Saturday, we hit some spots that were 100% Jersey. The first stop was a pilgrimage to two pop culture points of interest. Of course I'm speaking of Satriale's Pork Store & Meat Market and Pizzaland. For those unaware of these two establishments, I'll provide some background. Satriale's is a fictional pork market featured on the TV show, The Sopranos. It's actually an abandoned auto repair building on Kearny Blvd in Kearny, NJ, which is the hometown of our friend John Schalago (whose wife Lynn is Regis's best buddy here in Jersey). The Schalagos were kind enough to take us on a tour of Kearny so I could see the building. Unfortunately, the signage has been taken down since filming for the show ceased (the store was on last night's episode though and they filmed an exchange between the FBI and Tony right there on Kearny Blvd, so it was neat to hear Regis yell "that's where I parked my van so you could dangerously take pictures of an abandoned building").

Just down the way from Satriale's, in North Arlington, NJ (which is adjacent to Kearny), is Pizzaland. Pizzaland is a small brick building with the store name in gaudy green letters at the top. If you've watched the Sopranos, you've seen Pizzaland in the opening credits. The family picture we had taken in front of it will serve as a lovely and touching reminder of our time here. Sadly, the 375-pound pizza man who emerged from the store just prior to the photo shoot asked not to be included in the photos. Interesting.

After the Sopranos tour concluded, we (the Schalagos had not given up on us yet) headed to Weehawken, which is on the Hudson River just across from Midtown Manhattan. Weehawken, besides having a delightful name, was originally settled in 1609 by Henry Hudson and was used as a lookout during the Revolutionary War, by the tax-dodging beer-swilling Patriots that we are happy to call our forefathers. It served this purpose because it sits upon a cliff overlooking the Hudson River and Manhattan. As I stood there, I thought of the exact two questions that are in your mind now. First, what are the odds that Henry Hudson would have traversed a river of the same name, and second, how likely would it be that Annie would try to rappel down the cliff? Weehawken is also home to Hamilton Park, which is named for Alexander Hamilton, who is in your wallet on the $10 bill. On July 11, 1804, in this lovely park, Hamilton was fatally shot in a duel with the sitting vice president, Aaron Burr, who of course is famous for being in the first "Got Milk" commercial. Can you imagine a world where the sitting vice president would shoot someone? Fortunately we live in much more civilized times.

Weehawken is just north of Hoboken, NJ, which is arguably the birthplace of baseball, which segues nicely into our Sunday adventure, which was the aforementioned (which comes from the Latin "mentiondum longum tu tuo" meaning mentioned 45 minutes ago when 3/4 of you were still reading) trip to the Baseball Hall of Fame.

On Sunday, we resumed our mastery of the Eisenhower Interstate System and headed toward Cooperstown, NY, a tiny hamlet in the foothills of the Catskills in upstate New York. Upstate New York is a heavily wooded area mainly devoid of civilization, which is why Rip Van Winkle was able to sleep for twenty years without disruption. Regis is considering relocating here. On the way to the final destination, you pass places like "Pistol Packing Mama's Antiques and Firearms" and wonder how this part of the state coexists with the city that also bears its name. Cooperstown is on the banks of Lake Otsego, which is the source of the Susquehanna River. The town was founded by James Fenimore Cooper, author of the Last of the Mohicans, starring Daniel Day Lewis. It is also the home of the Baseball Hall of Fame, built in 1939, the year considered the centennial of the game. The Hall is three stories and features such artifacts as the uniforms of Lou Gehrig and Babe Ruth, the bat Hank Aaron used to hit his 500th home run, the glove Willie Mays used to make his famous catch in the 1954 World Series, and Barry Bonds' syringe. The Hall also had a gift shop which featured pink baseballs, of which two were purchased so as to prevent fighting (a plan which like so many others like it, failed). Jimmy and I probably could have spent a few days there, but Annie and Maggie were less tolerant. They were good sports, as always, but not up for making a week out of a visit to the "baseball museum."

On the way to Cooperstown, we stopped in Scranton, Pennsylvania, home of the fictitious paper company Dunder Mifflin from the TV show, The Office. Scranton is a charming town on the banks of the Lackawanna River. Maroon banners hang from the town's lamp posts, each featuring a different local business. Having embraced the show that has made their town a household name of sorts, they actually have a banner featuring Dunder Mifflin. With the help of some locals, we found the Penn Paper factory that is featured during the show's opening credits, and during a downpour got some pictures. Our therapist might say we have issues differentiating between real life and fiction, but we think she's just angry about losing Tony as a client.

We have a few more weeks left so there is still a chance for more adventures. You can see all the places we've visited so far on this Google map. Who knows what we might do before the end of the month. I think Rikers Island has a nice tour.

Hope all is well. Let us know how you are doing.