XIV: The August Travelers
It's been so long, I think it's about time to "get back in the saddle." Yes, that's right, after a 12-year layoff, I'm signing up for fantasy football again this year! The draft was Saturday and I'm feeling good about my team...oh wait, it's also been awhile since the dreaded NYC Update.
When we last left our heroes, it was August 1st and they had just bid adieu to the extended family. Well, now it's September 6th and they have just bid adieu to the extended family. The more things change, the more they stay the same. In the meantime, we've had a few experiences that bear mentioning. Whether or not they hold your interest past the next paragraph remains to be seen. So far, I'm even bored by this update. But here goes nothing...
On August 7th, we took a trip to Nashville to see my sister and family. In the process, Annie and Maggie took their very first plane ride. And I took my very first Paxil. The fact that there is little else to write about it is probably a good thing, and I should be thankful, right? Of course during the trip, which was to Nashville, I wrecked a rental car. No one was injured, aside from my ego. Have you met my ego? His name is Alfredo and he is a rather large man. And he bruises easily. Anyway, during some time with my sister, we ran into with a small boy who took a rather odd liking to our family. We (Jimmy and I) decided his name should be Felipe and referred to him as Felipe for the entire day. It was odd and hard to explain, but extremely funny to the two of us. I think you had to be there.
On Monday, August 15th, through a stroke of good luck (and bad weather), I was able to attend the final four holes of the PGA championship. A friend of mine from work had purchased two passes to the tournament and had been accompanied by Mrs. Friend-of-mine-from-work for the weekend rounds. Being that the tournament was suspended because of lightning at 6 pm on Sunday night, with four holes left to go, the outcome was to be determined Monday morning. And as they live in Long Island, she was none too excited about embarking on the journey back to the course (located in Springfield, NJ, just 20 minutes south of the Watson homestead). So I did the noble thing and volunteered! We sat in the grandstand on the right side of the 18th hole, and had excellent seats for the Mickelson flop shot (I can be seen in the PGA commercial that features his putt... Just look for the guy in the orange shirt). The highlight, was not seeing Phil hoist the trophy, or his unkempt son running around the green afterward. No, it was watching Greg Owen and Lee Westwood finish their rounds. Greg and Lee, both from the UK, each had 6 foot putts remaining on 18 and were forced to come back to finish them up Monday. Quite ridiculous, especially given that they were both out of contention. They came to the green, putters in hand, without caddies, and finished up, but not before inducing the crowd to start the wave. They finished their rounds with rather sarcastic and overstated fist pumping which of course the crowd loved. I will root for them in every tournament from now on.
The last couple of weeks could be best characterized as a relaxation sandwich on two slices of mayhem. Here's how things started -- Regis drove the kids out to Indiana on the 21st, then drove to Cleveland the 26th to meet me for a wedding (I flew to Cleveland from NJ). Then we drove back to Indiana on the 28th, spent the week with grandparents, and drove back to NJ on September 4th. In total, the van saw 2,998.5 miles in that time. Fortunately, while stationary, we had a relaxing time in the Hoosier state. Maggie became my mother's shadow and enjoyed helping her make "macamoni" and cheese, which Annie enjoyed eating said macamoni. Meanwhile, Jimmy found enough legos to repair the 17th street levee. It must be said that the drive home went as smoothly as it could. We stopped just five times (which I am submitting to Guinness for submission in the Book of Records immediately) and had this exchange somewhere in western Ohio.
Jim: Guess how many miles are the on the "trip" odometer.
Regis: 2300
Jim: Higher
Regis: 2350
Jim: Lower
Regis: 2340
Jim: Lower
Regis: 2338
Jim: Higher
Regis 2339
Jim: Lower
Regis: 2338.5
Jim: Higher
Regis 2338.9
Jim: Higher
Regis: 2340
Jim: Higher
Regis: ????
Jim: Well, it's moving as you're guessing.
On one of the five stops, we went to Wendy's, during which Jimmy asked if he could have some of my Frosty. Regis asked Jimmy if he finished his nuggets, at which time Jimmy showed her the empty box. Maggie then asked if she could have some fries. Again, Regis asked if she finished her nuggets. Maggie, ever the clever one, showed us Jimmy's empty box.
Tomorrow is Jimmy's first day of school (good thing for school calendars), and Maggie starts pre-school next Monday. Annie is taking gymnastics with Regis, which has to be good for future update material, right?
That's all for now, but I leave you all with a trivia question:
Q: Which U.S. President could write Greek with one hand and Latin with the other hand, at the same time?
A: Two could, in fact. Garfield and Jefferson.
Bonus question: how many cliches did I use in this email?
Answer in the next update. Stay tuned!
When we last left our heroes, it was August 1st and they had just bid adieu to the extended family. Well, now it's September 6th and they have just bid adieu to the extended family. The more things change, the more they stay the same. In the meantime, we've had a few experiences that bear mentioning. Whether or not they hold your interest past the next paragraph remains to be seen. So far, I'm even bored by this update. But here goes nothing...
On August 7th, we took a trip to Nashville to see my sister and family. In the process, Annie and Maggie took their very first plane ride. And I took my very first Paxil. The fact that there is little else to write about it is probably a good thing, and I should be thankful, right? Of course during the trip, which was to Nashville, I wrecked a rental car. No one was injured, aside from my ego. Have you met my ego? His name is Alfredo and he is a rather large man. And he bruises easily. Anyway, during some time with my sister, we ran into with a small boy who took a rather odd liking to our family. We (Jimmy and I) decided his name should be Felipe and referred to him as Felipe for the entire day. It was odd and hard to explain, but extremely funny to the two of us. I think you had to be there.
On Monday, August 15th, through a stroke of good luck (and bad weather), I was able to attend the final four holes of the PGA championship. A friend of mine from work had purchased two passes to the tournament and had been accompanied by Mrs. Friend-of-mine-from-work for the weekend rounds. Being that the tournament was suspended because of lightning at 6 pm on Sunday night, with four holes left to go, the outcome was to be determined Monday morning. And as they live in Long Island, she was none too excited about embarking on the journey back to the course (located in Springfield, NJ, just 20 minutes south of the Watson homestead). So I did the noble thing and volunteered! We sat in the grandstand on the right side of the 18th hole, and had excellent seats for the Mickelson flop shot (I can be seen in the PGA commercial that features his putt... Just look for the guy in the orange shirt). The highlight, was not seeing Phil hoist the trophy, or his unkempt son running around the green afterward. No, it was watching Greg Owen and Lee Westwood finish their rounds. Greg and Lee, both from the UK, each had 6 foot putts remaining on 18 and were forced to come back to finish them up Monday. Quite ridiculous, especially given that they were both out of contention. They came to the green, putters in hand, without caddies, and finished up, but not before inducing the crowd to start the wave. They finished their rounds with rather sarcastic and overstated fist pumping which of course the crowd loved. I will root for them in every tournament from now on.
The last couple of weeks could be best characterized as a relaxation sandwich on two slices of mayhem. Here's how things started -- Regis drove the kids out to Indiana on the 21st, then drove to Cleveland the 26th to meet me for a wedding (I flew to Cleveland from NJ). Then we drove back to Indiana on the 28th, spent the week with grandparents, and drove back to NJ on September 4th. In total, the van saw 2,998.5 miles in that time. Fortunately, while stationary, we had a relaxing time in the Hoosier state. Maggie became my mother's shadow and enjoyed helping her make "macamoni" and cheese, which Annie enjoyed eating said macamoni. Meanwhile, Jimmy found enough legos to repair the 17th street levee. It must be said that the drive home went as smoothly as it could. We stopped just five times (which I am submitting to Guinness for submission in the Book of Records immediately) and had this exchange somewhere in western Ohio.
Jim: Guess how many miles are the on the "trip" odometer.
Regis: 2300
Jim: Higher
Regis: 2350
Jim: Lower
Regis: 2340
Jim: Lower
Regis: 2338
Jim: Higher
Regis 2339
Jim: Lower
Regis: 2338.5
Jim: Higher
Regis 2338.9
Jim: Higher
Regis: 2340
Jim: Higher
Regis: ????
Jim: Well, it's moving as you're guessing.
On one of the five stops, we went to Wendy's, during which Jimmy asked if he could have some of my Frosty. Regis asked Jimmy if he finished his nuggets, at which time Jimmy showed her the empty box. Maggie then asked if she could have some fries. Again, Regis asked if she finished her nuggets. Maggie, ever the clever one, showed us Jimmy's empty box.
Tomorrow is Jimmy's first day of school (good thing for school calendars), and Maggie starts pre-school next Monday. Annie is taking gymnastics with Regis, which has to be good for future update material, right?
That's all for now, but I leave you all with a trivia question:
Q: Which U.S. President could write Greek with one hand and Latin with the other hand, at the same time?
A: Two could, in fact. Garfield and Jefferson.
Bonus question: how many cliches did I use in this email?
Answer in the next update. Stay tuned!
posted by Watts at 4:20 PM
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